Your bum doesn’t look big in that dress.

“No Dear! Your bum doesn’t look big in that dress. In fact most of your bum isn’t even in the bloody thing.”

“There’s no need to get arsey about my new dress. Just because your little Wifey likes to show a little more than usual.”

“Nice pun my love, but we both know why don’t we.”

“Do tell little man.”

“It’s for that big black bloke i saw you with the other day. He’ll be at the party won’t he.”

“So if I start making out with him, it won’t be a big surprise will it cucky.”

“Watching you being seduced by big handsome Black Studs is never a surprise for me my Sweet Little Slut.”